Monsieur Robot presents – Merry Christmas!

As you may already know I’m crazy about Christmas and have been preparing for ages. I’ve got all the food I need, all the booze too. Gifts are bought and wrapped, the tree is decorated as well so it’s just a waiting game now until I can open all my gifts! But wait…. I have forgotten something, what am I going to wear? A lot of money gets spent on clothes at Christmas. Socks sales alone must be enough to cure the economic climate but while people spend money on outfits for work parties and Christmas dinner parties few people plan an outfit for the big day.
Christmas jumpers have gone right past ‘naff’ and somehow ended up at ‘cool’. Intentionally ugly knitwear is one of my favourite trends of recent years so I’m thrilled that I can work it into Christmas. Plenty of high street shops have reindeer and snowflake jumpers and sweatshirts which are perfect for the season…wear yours with pride. Christmas is too kitsch to not be ironic…that doesn’t mean you can use tinsel as an accessory though. Much of the autumn/winter trends for men are perfectly festive. From Fair Isle knits to tartan shirts there should be something in every mans wardrobe which translates without leaving you looking like a disgruntled Santa’s grotto worker. 
If you have Christmas at home then you might not feel the need to get dressed at all. I spend a good portion of the day in my pajamas but you’re going to someone else’s house for Christmas you should definitely make an effort, or at least get dressed. People love taking photographs at Christmas, which is something I always forget. Don’t get caught off guard, you don’t want cold hard photographic evidence of any misgivings. Too much mulled wine makes your cheeks and nose go red so get the photos done before then unless you genuinely want to look like Rudolph. I speak from experience here, breaking into people’s houses in the middle of the night and deleting pictures off their camera is no way to spend New Years Eve.
My biggest worries are the paper hats that come in Christmas crackers. I struggle with hats at the best of times so hats made entirely out of paper are pretty low on the list of things I want to wear. They’re also either far too big or too small to fit on my unusually large head. This year though I have a plan. I’m going to sellotape a couple together à la Lady Gaga and pray that everyone’s too drunk to ask what I’m wearing. That’s how I get through most situations anyway.
Merry Christmas everyone x